# Getting really PO'd and frustrated. What would you do?



## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

Back in June, shortly after I lost the last of my pet rats, a friend of my boyfriend and mine asked if I'd foster his two rats for "a month or two" while he was between apartments and staying on his friend's couch. I decided not to continue with rats and had a huge open cage, so I agreed. He promised to provide supplies, food, etc. 

A couple months go by, he brought supplies a couple times during that period, but asked me if I'd hold them a bit longer. I agreed. 

A couple more months go by, he has stopped bringing supplies at this point and says it's taking too long for him to find a place, so he'd ask some other friends if they wanted to adopt them and get back to me the next day. 

A week later he calls and says he had no luck trying to place them and asks me to place the rats for him  Fine. I had been trying for a couple months (obviously with no luck) and a few weeks ago he contacts us and says "I'm going to look at an apartment today and I'd love to take my girls back!" Yayyy! FINALLY! 

Several days later I try to get in touch with him for an update, he doesn't respond. Today I posted on his facebook wall asking him when he plans on taking them back, hoping he'll respond to that. I'm not holding my breath, but we'll see. 

I'm pissed that a "friend" of ours has taken advantage like this, hasn't held up his part of the deal, and is now avoiding me. I don't want to keep these rats. They're very sweet, but I decided that I was done when the last of mine passed away. They've got to be close to two years old now, and this is when we start to see tumors. I have my enough on my plate, both time-wise and financially with the other animals without adding the rats. I've tried to be very patient with this guy, but I've made it pretty clear that something needs to happen asap. My boyfriend has also been pretty freaking blunt with him several times in person. He keeps saying he's trying. 

On the other hand, I don't want anything bad to happen to them. I want to make sure they have a safe place to go to with somebody who will love and care for them until it's their time to go to ratty heaven. 

Any suggestions?


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

UPDATE: 

He just texted me and said he'll pick them up on Friday and that I'll be compensated for everything. I don't so much care about the compensation, but it would be nice!

Now, again, I'm not holding my breath, because he has arranged to drop off supplies several times and has totally blown me off, no phone call or anything. But I'm hoping for the best.


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## lmgakg (Jan 1, 2011)

Wow, that sucks! I probably would change his status from friend to acquaintance! Also, he may just be embarrassed that he hasn't held up his end of the deal and that's causing the avoiding, however, that's no excuse. Does he have a good or bad track record of being dependable? Any financial hardships on his side that have occurred that could contribute to his lack of responsibility? Again, not a good excuse, but it happens. If I were you, I'd just keep trying to place them, whether he says he wants them back or not. Clearly, whatever his situation is right now that is keeping him from being cool about this is definitely also going to make him not care for them in the way that you would be happy/content with. Good luck to you! You may also want to check with schools (elementary/preschool) maybe someone needs a class pet...or even craigslist - if you list it with a fee (you could even say negotiable dependant upon circumstances) and state that an application needs to be filled out and approved, you may find a good home. Might at least be worth a shot. You can always turn someone down if you don't think they have good intentions!!


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## rannmiller (Jun 27, 2008)

Sounds like when my old roommate was watching his friend's fish in a giant aquarium when he first moved into my house. He didn't even bother to let me know the fish were moving in with him, I just came home and there they were. They were only supposed to be there for a week, but two months went by and they were still there. I evicted that roommate for other reasons, and a month later the fish were still there. It wasn't until I have him a deadline to have the fish out or I'd give them away on craigslist (I already had a taker lined up) that his friend _finally_ came for the fish and took them away. 

Sometimes you just have to be harsh with people. Let this guy know that if he doesn't pick up the rats on Friday, then on Saturday they are going to the Humane Society.


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

Yeah, if he blows me off on Friday I'm just going to say "You have a week to pick them up or I'm placing them, end of story". 

I'm unsure of financial hardships... He's had a job this whole time and doesn't have a rent living on his friend's couch. He was telling me about this loft apartment he's getting when he said he wanted the rats back a couple weeks ago... He said it's $600 a month. If he can afford that then I assume he could afford to cover supplies when he didn't have a rent to pay! But who knows what else he had going on. As far as a track record of being responsible and reliable, I haven't known him more than a couple years and have never encountered a situation like this with him, nor have I heard of him screwing anybody over. My boyfriend has known him for years and has other friends that have grown up with him. He's an all-around nice guy, doesn't cause any drama or trouble, always friendly and polite to everyone, very funny, etc. I don't think he intends to do any of this maliciously; like you said, he's probably embarrassed (and I think a bit of a slacker in getting his sh*t together). 

Before I agreed to foster the rats, he'd talk to me about them since I also had some. He didn't know about proper care, diet, housing, etc (somebody pretty much dumped them on him, as well) but made a lot of positive changes to their care when I informed him of those things. So I know that he won't neglect them or anything, it was probably just really easy to let someone else do all the work and spend all the money and not have to worry about it


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

rannmiller said:


> Sounds like when my old roommate was watching his friend's fish in a giant aquarium when he first moved into my house. He didn't even bother to let me know the fish were moving in with him, I just came home and there they were. They were only supposed to be there for a week, but two months went by and they were still there. I evicted that roommate for other reasons, and a month later the fish were still there. It wasn't until I have him a deadline to have the fish out or I'd give them away on craigslist (I already had a taker lined up) that his friend _finally_ came for the fish and took them away.
> 
> Sometimes you just have to be harsh with people. Let this guy know that if he doesn't pick up the rats on Friday, then on Saturday they are going to the Humane Society.


Yes, that's definitely how it'll have to go down!


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

Hmph...I've had something similar happen, but with MY "BEST" friend, and her two DOGS, and it DIDN'T end pretty...

http://dogfoodchat.com/forum/general-dog-discussion/4617-new-dilemma.html


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

Yeah, I remember when you posted about that situation. I was actually thinking about it as I posted! Man, what's up with people? Times get tough and they just pawn everything off on somebody else? If they aren't willing to take responsibility for their animals, they shouldn't get them in the first place. Sheesh!


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

RachelsaurusRexU said:


> Yeah, I remember when you posted about that situation. I was actually thinking about it as I posted! Man, what's up with people? Times get tough and they just pawn everything off on somebody else? If they aren't willing to take responsibility for their animals, they shouldn't get them in the first place. Sheesh!


Exactly!!! And then they act put-off when you start getting frustrated with their lack of effort to do something about the situation, when YOU'RE the one doing all of the work and trying to make things work out!


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

Grrrrr!!! I'm getting heated thinking about it!

At least homeboy isn't giving me a hard time about getting on his case, though. He knows he's in the wrong! I'd lose it on the dude if he started back-sassing me!


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

haha. Last I heard from this girl was when she texted me to tell me to keep her name out of my mouth because I told my ex-douche bag that I have friends, too...better friends than her. hahahahaha.

She's burning all of her bridges, and she'll regret it in the end.


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

Yup, she probably will! 

"But it's too late, baby, now it's too late..."

Haha. I'm an idiot. I know.


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

ahhahahahaha!!! Now I'm gonna have that song stuck in my head for some time. XP

And yes, it's too late. I'm done putting myself through the crap that people give me.


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## Mia (Oct 4, 2010)

Did he end up talking the rats back? Or what happened?


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## RachelsaurusRexU (Sep 4, 2010)

YES! He FINALLY took them back the night he said he was going to....and now another friend is fostering them. 

Poor gals have been through so many homes, I feel sorry for them. I saw him a few days ago and he said he was finally getting a place and taking them back, but it's not the first time he's said that. Sad part is, once he finally does get them back (if he ever does) he'll barely have any time with them.


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## Mia (Oct 4, 2010)

If people can't care for their pets, they should just adopt them out! Not fair to them.


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