# How do you know its time for another one?



## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

Since losing my cat, there has been a very empty space. Lincoln hasnt been the same either. I had someone offer me a kitten, male..a few to chose from. But I dont know if I should?, would getting one now for Lincoln be to soon and seem like replacing the other one? How long did you wait before getting another pet after your previous one passed on?


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

Personally, I don't think it's replacing the cat that passed on, because you can NEVER replace an animal, and I think it's a shame that there are people that think that about people who do get another animal or whatever right after one passes on. It just means that you have room again to save another little kitten somewhere.

As far as Lincoln goes, he doesn't understand why his little buddy is gone, so I think it would be good to give him something new to take his mind off the missing friend. I think you would be doing right by Lincoln to get yourself a kitten.


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## CorgiPaws (Mar 31, 2009)

I think that this is a question IMPOSSIBLE to answer for anyone but yourself. You have to ask yourself a series of questions. 

1. Do I have the time for another pet?
2. Do I have the resources for another pet, including space, funds, patience,etc.?
3. Do I have the financial stability to accommodate a medical (or other)emergency?
4, Is every other member of my household (including other pets!) on board with getting another pet?
5. AM I prepared to work through possible issues between my current pets, and the new pet?
6. Can I give the new pet the same level of care I give my others, without compromising the care my current pets are receiving? (for example, I would not cut duck (2.50/lb) out of my girls diet, to afford to feed a third dog, if that makes sense.)


If ALL of those check out, then you ask yourself if you are emotionally ready. If you are, and only you can answer that for yourself, then I see no reason not to. 
But, if ANY single one of those is a "no" then it's not the right timing, as much as that sucks sometimes.


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

Oh, and those are good rules to live by, too. hehehe. Like me, I'd LOVE another dog, but right now is just not the right time. :biggrin::wink:


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## CorgiPaws (Mar 31, 2009)

xxshaelxx said:


> Oh, and those are good rules to live by, too. hehehe. Like me, I'd LOVE another dog, but right now is just not the right time. :biggrin::wink:


Ditto! lol. 
I don't think it's replacing the pet that passed, though, because, well, you CANT replace a pet. 
I'll be honest, if someone told me today that annie or zailey had 30 days to live... I'd be looking at breeders as we speak. That's how I cope. I dwell if I don't have something else to focus on.


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

1. Do I have the time for another pet?
2. Do I have the resources for another pet, including space, funds, patience,etc.?
3. Do I have the financial stability to accommodate a medical (or other)emergency?
4, Is every other member of my household (including other pets!) on board with getting another pet?
5. AM I prepared to work through possible issues between my current pets, and the new pet?
6. Can I give the new pet the same level of care I give my others, without compromising the care my current pets are receiving? (for example, I would not cut duck (2.50/lb) out of my girls diet, to afford to feed a third dog, if that makes sense.)

1. Yes
2. Yes ( I plan to pull out insurance on this kitten)
3. Yes (insurance and plan to save)
4. Yes
5. Yes
6. Yes (I plan to raw feed this one and I already figured out prices etc)

I think getting another now may help me cope actually. I got Lincoln after I lost Gunner and I was able to get past it sooner etc. 

Also, for those who are wondering. I want a male and YES I will be neutering it as soon as it hits 4-5 months.


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## cprcheetah (Jul 14, 2010)

I think it's a personal decision, for me I find that getting a new pet soon helps the healing process for me as I have someone to focus my attention on. I think Lincoln is grieving & depressed because he's missing Chloe. Here is something that someone shared on a group I am on after I lost my chihuahua Sebastian to decon poisoning (my neighbors crappy kid). A little bit after Sebastian died I brought home my cat Mercedes, she's actually a kitten I bottle raised but at 7 months she was still up for adoption. She has her quarks, and totally helped heal our hearts, she is the most LOVING cat, she would sit in our arms and 'flop/nuzzle' against our necks. She ALWAYS makes us feel loved.

" It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are." -- Cheryl Zuccaro

I think it can be applied to cats & other animals as well, as I know that every animal I lose takes a piece of my heart but the new animals help mend and fill in the holes in my heart, you CAN'T EVER replace one animal with another. I don't think that's even remotely possible because each animal has their own personality, their own quarks etc. If you feel you are ready for a new kitten, go for it. I always ask myself the questions Linsey asked before I consider a new animal into my family....in addition to "Will my hubby kill me if I bring home another animal?" He He


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## 3Musketeers (Nov 4, 2010)

Methinks Lincoln will be thrilled with the kitten :biggrin:


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

k9capture_16 said:


> 1. Do I have the time for another pet?
> 2. Do I have the resources for another pet, including space, funds, patience,etc.?
> 3. Do I have the financial stability to accommodate a medical (or other)emergency?
> 4, Is every other member of my household (including other pets!) on board with getting another pet?
> ...


It sounds like you're more than ready to fill that hole in your heart. I think that you're currently dwelling on the stereotype that people do when people get a new pet, thinking that they're replacing an old pet. If you've already planned out this much for a new kitten, I think that's you telling yourself it's exactly what you want, and personally, I think you should take that next step to find the perfect little boy to fit into your family.

And just remember...you will never be replacing Chloe or her kittens, and she will always hold a spot in your memory and heart as long as you want her to be there.


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## stajbs (Jun 5, 2010)

I think everyone has shared valuable and sensitive advice. All very helpful information to consider.

For us personally after losing 5 of 7 siberians, I have come to understand you never replace another beloved furry family member. Instead when all the "stars allign " and the time is right, you just know it and you bring in that new member of your family. 

While in the past we have always waited months to bring in a new siberian because they needed to fit in and we had many variables, it took us a while. Recently I look at our two senior sibes, and I feel blessed to still have them, I fully intend to enjoy them and give them my all, but I also recognize that I cannot live without a dog, preferably more than one. My recent way of coping with what I know lies ahead is that I have researched other breeds, and begun speaking to folks who are active in malamutes. I know what we love in a siberian and I hope to always have one sharing our lives, but we recently decided to add a malamute to that mix if it is at all possible. We are fortunate to know numerous people involved with mals and when the time is right we will be looking in that direction. Is the time right now, no, we are dedicated to Blaze and Silva, so I already turned down a beautiful 6 month old female, and a "pet" quality mal from a litter due around Thanksgiving. There are several folks we are working with who all have dual purpose malamutes, who both show well, and come from working lines. This is what I know will fit our lifestyle. My most important requirements are going to be health and temperament, and this will probably be the first time we don't actually just pluck a dog from a shelter. I feel we have the skills and knowledge to do that with siberians, but with a malamute and a grandson now we are feeling the need to be more picky. 

So, we are excited to enjoy life with our two senior furballs at the present, but we have also been able to keep ourselves excited and motivated further into the future as long as all can go according to plan. If something changes we will adjust again. 

Here's hoping you and Lincoln find what is right for both of you as soon as the time is right.


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

Well I have been feeling rather guilty after hearing a few responses (not from on here). I may not be the richest person in the world but I do care for my animals. I do complain about the prices of vet care I will be the first to admit that. But, that said I complained about the cost of the ear surgery Lincoln needed, but I did get it for him. I am still complaining about the price for Ruby;s tooth extraction, but I am still paying for half of it (looong story), I still complain about the cost of blood work but Lincoln got his a couple months back and ruby will be getting hers sometime soon. I complain about the cost of speutering (term used to lump both together since I am to lazy to type it), but both my dogs are speutered. I complained about the cost of HW meds ($120 for a 60lb is steep) but both mine are on preventative..granted I dont give it as directed..I give it every 2 months. 

Gunner, needed an umbilical hernia repaired, I had full plans to repair that, My previous Rottie got his hip x-rays done, ultrasound on the heart, ECG etc. My Rottie wasnt fixed, but, that was a personal choice (never bred btw). 

I dont deprive my animals of anything. My dogs are fed good food. I eat less so they can eat better. 

That said, I know people who have LOTS of money and they know their pets are ill or need a surgery but they just dont care. I do the best with what I have, at least I do stuff. My Uncle makes at least 800k a year. His dog is out back dying from something ( not sure what) and can barely walk. He doesnt care and he will not waiste money at the vet. I do what I do for my animals, they are what keeps me here. They are all I have.

If I get another kitten, it will be vaccinated according to my sceduale. It will be neutered. I dont have the heart to own another female, in fact I am a little nervous to. But this new kitten if I get one will NOT be deprived of ANY THING. It will eat canned food (while I research raw for cats). Not like I am a terrible person who shouldnt own any animals or get another cat.


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

You don't have to be the richest person in the world to provide good care for you pets. You don't even have to be making good money. In the end, pets will save YOU money, because they're good for YOUR health. When you're depressed, your immunity goes down, you're more prone to pick up illnesses, or to succumb to them. Or you're more likely to have to go on medications for depression. Animals are definitely great therapy for that, and if you take really great care of your animals, which you definitely do, then they really don't cost that much. Imagine if Ruby and Lincoln were on a poor quality diet like...*shudders* Science Diet? Do you think their health would be as good as it is now? You may still be paying off vet bills now, but if they were on that diet, you'd probably be paying a lot more.

Don't beat yourself around about getting another cat, and don't let anyone else do so. If YOU know it's the right decision for you, then it's the right decision for you, and no one else can say one thing or another against you, or they should be ashamed if they do. Nobody knows your situation like you do.


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

Yeah, Thanks. Lincoln had I not of found this or the other forum would be on Science Diet *gags*. I would still be paying $50 a month to have him on prednisone, then $30 for shots when the prednisone wasnt enough. I try my hardest for my animals, anything I ever do is for them. I just wish more people would see I love my pets and really do care for them. 

I am going to go look at these kittens tm, but I dont know if I will take one. It has to be the right one. I will be taking Lincoln with me..after all its his cat lol


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

Wow. Mum's cat is on Prescription Diet, gets shots every three weeks, and is on prednisone every other day. haha. Similar? I think so. Perhaps I can use your experience as more proof to get my mother to switch her cat to a better diet. haha.

And good luck! Definitely don't settle until you find the PERFECT cat. I was filling out the forms for one kitty that was absolutely adorable, playful, but really shy, when I saw Theus climbing around in his cage on the front desk at the Humane Society. I stopped and watched him for a few minutes, and was, like, "I WANT TO SEE HIM!" So I took him into one of their visiting rooms, and he was...oh my dog...amazing! Loved him ever since. haha.

Again, good luck! If you succeed, you KNOW we want pictures!


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

Maybe just to be cruel I will withhold the pictures :tongue:. I was finally able to get the dog to eat something. Hes happily munching on a frozen pork breast.


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## rannmiller (Jun 27, 2008)

Yeah I know that sometimes getting a new pet can help ease the pain of losing the old one just because it gives you something else to focus on and love/nurture, not replace in the slightest though (but i'm being redundant from what others have said). 

My mom's cat lived to be 17.5 years old and she could only go 2 months before she had to get another cat to help fill the kitty void in her heart. After I had to have my foster kitty pts a few months ago, I was absolutely crushed and scared to even hold kittens for fear I'd give one something terrible that caused its death even though her death was definitely not my fault (I still blame myself though :frown. Now several months later, another kitty in need came along at my clinic and I've adopted him and it feels really right to have him around. 

So as others have already stated, it really depends on you and your emotional readiness for a new kitty. It sounds to me like you and Lincoln are both ready for a new furry family member, so while you may not end up choosing one from your friend's litter, I know the right one will come along for you soon and it sounds to me like you're very well prepared for this one too :smile:


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## SerenityFL (Sep 28, 2010)

I think if you know you can care for the cat and you think it will help cope, you are ready. Frankly, that you're even asking about another cat shows me you are ready.

Others are right, there is no definitive answer other than, are you ready? If you are, get another cat.

I feel bad for you that you lost Chloe and I hope that should you decide to get another cat, it will help you cope and that you find happier times.


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## MollyWoppy (Mar 19, 2010)

I feel that if you are asking the question, then you are ready. You are not replacing her, it's not possible, thats guilt talking. I feel each animal we have teaches us to be a better owner to the next. The best thing you can do is to give the love you had for Chloe to another kitten that may not have much of a chance in life.


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## werecatrising (Oct 15, 2010)

I don't think there is any set amount of time to wait before getting a new animal. You are not replacing one- you are honoring the memory of the one who passed. Putting Angel down was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I am only recently to the point where I don't cry for him at least a few times a week. People were surprised- a few even made comments- that I adopted Quinn a week later. I NEEDED another dog to help me move on. There was a beautiful, sweet, deserving dog about to be euthanized for issues I was more than capable of dealing with. Seemed like the perfect time to me.

As for money, nobody says you deprive your animals of anything or need to be rich to own them. However, after spending hours talking to a person with an animal in dire need of attention who simply cannot afford care at the moment, I can't in good conscious tell them I think it is a good idea to get another. Insurance is good in many ways. The problem is that most of them reimburse you. That means you still need to pay up front. There are unexpected things that pop up. I am the queen of late night emergencies. I am lucky to be in a situation now where I can pay later, but before I worked for a vet, I made sure I had an empty credit card or quite a bit in the bank at all times.


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

Well I dont feel the need to explain the full situation to everyone. So, for those who would like pics of the newcomer IF I decide to get another I will private message you a few pics. But I do not feel the need to post it up here so people can bash me some more.


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## CorgiPaws (Mar 31, 2009)

k9capture_16 said:


> Well I dont feel the need to explain the full situation to everyone. So, for those who would like pics of the newcomer IF I decide to get another I will private message you a few pics. But I do not feel the need to post it up here so people can bash me some more.


I was unaware anyone bashed you at all for asking this?


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## deb9017 (Aug 31, 2010)

CorgiPaws said:


> I was unaware anyone bashed you at all for asking this?


I wondered the same thing. I thought there were a lot of really nice positive replies.


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## k9capture_16 (Aug 23, 2010)

No there were some nice replies. Just a few rude ones.


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## MollyWoppy (Mar 19, 2010)

Me thinks you're being too sensitive. You have an awful lot to offer to a cat looking for a home.
So, run out, go get your new little kitten and enjoy him.


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## spookychick13 (Jan 26, 2010)

Persecution complex.

Maybe you should demand this thread be closed as well?


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## xxshaelxx (Mar 8, 2010)

Okay, come on, guys, this is bordering on the wrong side of immaturity. Seriously, how would you like to be treated like thus. Let's just shut our fat traps and know that she learned her lesson already. -.-


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## DaneMama (Jun 27, 2008)

K9capture- Take things less personally and don't be so sensitive. Bashing isn't allowed here and I have yet to see any. So just let it go.

Everyone else- Drop it, or I will close this thread.

I'm serious, I'm tired of the drama lately. I'm not a nanny.


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## 3Musketeers (Nov 4, 2010)

*drops the keyboard*


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## DaneMama (Jun 27, 2008)

3Musketeers said:


> *drops the keyboard*


HA! It worked LOL

Seriously though, I am usually pretty good natured but with all the issues lately I'm cranky...and I don't like being cranky :frown:


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