Can I vent about my mother in law for a moment.... please?

[CorgiPaws]

Okay, so I have a mother-in-law, and she's freaking nuts. She's so sweet to us, and very very generous. (hell, she's giving me $25,000 to invest in a business, and that's just the start of the things she's done for us.)
But at the same time, this woman drives me up the wall, pull my hair out, scream into a pillow, NUTS. She called on our wedding night to see "how things were going." She drops by at 6am to see if we want to have breakfast with her. I mean, after all, she cooked it all up and brought it with her! She calls Jon at 3am to say hi. She texts me not even kidding, maybe 10-15 times per day. If we so much a have a houseguest, she drops off pizza and cookies, which is a nice gesture, but for hell's sake, we're not 13 anymore!

So, that's the beginning. Now, my family owns a water softening company in Utah, one my grandfather started a long time ago. When we moved into our house here in Vegas, I couldn't stand th hard water, and my brother came down and put a system in our house. Ahhh reverse osmosis showers. Anyway, said evil mother-in-law said she wanted one too. So he put one in her house. He was searching for the drain line, just to make sure the tube and the drain was lined up properly. The drain I'm talking about is usually in the garage somewhere, and it's closed off during construction, but punched out by the contractor when construction is complete. Anyway, he searched for about 30 minutes an she kept trying to rush him because she had to leave. Finally she told him to jsut go, and if there were any problems, then her contractor father would take care of it. He told her over and over that he wanted to just check it, to be sure. She eventually flat out told him to leave, that she couldn't wait anymore, and he made certain she was sure, even asked if he could come back later to look for the drain line. (this drain is put to use once per week when the softner cleans itself, and dumps the water, so it wasn't an immediate, must be done this instant thing) She told him to come back the next day, which he did, and she never showed up.
Well, the contractor never punched that drain out at all, and turns out it was located in a closet upstairs (what the heck... seriously?) and it flodded her house. Now she's making all kinds of threats to "bring the company down" and that she's going to be "their worst nightmare" and calling my brother incompitent and stupid and unprofessional. (my brother, the person that waved the $1000 labor fees and gave up his sales commission and did her install UNPAID for comissions, and drove 6 hours to do it all. She's also denied any of the conversation took place, and claims that he told her the job was done. She's also denying that he was supposed to come back the next day, even though she called him the day after standing him up to apologize for forgetting.



this woman drives me NUTS

[whiteleo]

Family, never loan them money, (don't know if I'd take that $25,000) and don't do business with them, thats the cardinal rule.

[g00dgirl]

Wow. If she would do that to your brother, I would be very wary of accepting the $25,000 as well. She might think she owns you then. Will she bitch about anything you spend money on, vacations, pets, car/clothes? My (much older) brother is helping me financially in my last year of school with the stipulation that I wouldn't be taking any big trips or making extravagant purchases, as if I could!
I'm sorry your family has to deal with this. Sounds similar to my best friend's MIL- except she is even worse. They moved and didn't even tell the MIL their new address!
Hope you can knock some sense in to her and she won't really try to bring down your family biz.

Do you guys live with or very close to her? How does she know when you have guests? lol

[CorgiPaws]

It's not a money loan, it's part of our wedding gift. ($25,000 to invest, $25,000 To put down on a house.) and i definately won't ever try to mesh my family and my husband's. My whole family has done business with eachother, my doggy daycare watches my brother's dog... My now-uncle's company has put softners in all our homes, all of us go through an insurence company my sister works at, etc. My family has a very "what's mine is yours, and the door is always open" policy and we'd never dream of going after eachother! I've now learned that not all families are like that! And she has the nerve to tell me my brother is an idiot?! Even if she wants to think that, fine... But why on earth would she tell me that, knowing how close me and my brother are.

[rannmiller]

Man that is messed up! Your poor brother must be feeling so bad right now

You can send the pizza and cookies my way though!

[spookychick13]

Family, never loan them money, (don't know if I'd take that $25,000) and don't do business with them, thats the cardinal rule.

Amen to that.

[spookychick13]

Family, never loan them money, (don't know if I'd take that $25,000) and don't do business with them, thats the cardinal rule.

Amen to that.
I can't believe she'd say that to you about your brother.
NOT OK

[DaneMama]

Dang...that is one tough situation.

I would be wary of taking the money too, even if it is a "legit" wedding gift. From the sounds of it this woman may be a bit on the shady side and would show you the same "two faced" behavior down the road because of this money.

As far as your brother's situation, don't get into the middle of it. And certainly don't let it get in the way of your relationship, that is more important in the grand scheme of things. This situation is between your brother and MIL. I know that your this is a family matter, but it is between them and they are both adults and can handle their own...I hope.

Does Jon know how you feel about his mother?

[xxshaelxx]

*dies a thousand deaths for MIL issues.*

I have to agree with everyone else, don't take the money... MIL's are EVIL! At least on the man's side. My parents love, love, LOVE my husband. My dad takes him fishing and hunting, and my mom takes him out to eat (her thing is spending money...long, awkwardly odd story, something about spending all of dad's hard earned money on the Internet and sending the packages to OUR house)... But MY MIL? omg....miserable.

She really does sound like a creeper. I would try to avoid doing anything that could get you in the same situation, because even if she seems nice now (in a not so nice way), it may all be a facade she's putting up...I'm sorry, but it just sounds creepy how she's always lingering in your business, almost like she's trying to cling to her son, even though he's married.

My MIL hates my guts for absolutely no reason at all and has tried numerous times to split Adam and I up. The whole "I don't like her, you should just do what makes you happy and leave her" argument. Yup, no reason at all, just "I hate her, leave her." WHY don't you like me?! Why don't you give THAT some thought?!

We actually lent her $3,000 a year ago, and her thanks? Guilt tripping my husband, trying to get the money back SEVEN days after she paid it back on the very LAST day that she owed it to us!!! Oh, and not to mention the guilt tripping him while we were TRYING to get the money back. -.- And did I mention that she STILL hates me, even though I lent her THREE THOUSAND DOLLARS?!

*rips out hair.*

Anyways, I want to say this: GOOD LUCK!

[rannmiller]

It's times like this I only have my own wonderful mother to worry about rather than someone else's haha!